Once again, I'm continuing the time-honored tradition of giving the Top 20 contestants nicknames because I probably will forget their real names later on, it's fun, and just because. I will say I'm a teense bummed because I can't remember if I ever saw a good chunk of these people during the auditions but I'll give it my best shot:
THE GIRLS
Bridget Whitman (Contemporary)- Liberty Lunch
Bridget is one of the many sob stories we've heard this season. Her dad was killed in a car accident when she was 12 and she remembers the Hallmark card message he told her years ago on how to succeed. Bridget also probably cries at the drop of a hat. Literally. For her audition, she performed to a cover of "Que Sera Sera" by Jennifer Terran which made it beautifully painful (emotionally) to watch. If she performed to the song I named her after, I will probably sob uncontrollably.
Brooklyn Fullmer (Latin Ballroom)- Ivory
She auditioned with her dance partner, who also made it in. They're like a perfect set, which makes their nicknames kind of handy.
Carly Blaney (Contemporary)- Busgirl
Mostly unmemorable for most of callbacks, and not featured for auditions, she didn't become prominent until she was in that disastrous (well, they all were horrible in the group round) group routine where that Rumba girl thought it was a great idea to incorporate the style in the dance. Apparently, she made green mile last time (or came close) and knew good and goddamn well that she's not giving up her spot when prompted by Nigel to get rid of someone themselves (a shitty move). Carly said that she didn't want to go home but "didn't want to throw someone under the bus."
Emily James (Contemporary)- Bankable
Emily auditioned in the past but came back after a hiatus of studying to be an accountant. But, accountants are no fun so she's back with a vengeance. Even her cousin gave a pretty boss audition!
Jacque Lewarne (Ballet)- Aunt Jackie
Another unmemorable dancer with virtually zero screen time so she gets an obvious nickname.
Jessica Richens (Jazz)- Hat Girl
The lone jazz dancer this season, Jessica performed two stellar solos that involved a hat that unleashed her long, flowing blonde hair that put Jabba Lee's routine to shame. Also, if there's a burlesque routine this season, she's probably gonna ace it.
Jourdan Epstein (Ballet)- Tough Broad
Her brother is a struggling addict who's currently on the mend, and the struggle she's gone through reflected in her audition, showcasing her strength and tenacity and all that powerful jazz.
Malene Ostergaard (Latin Ballroom)- Great Dane
In her career, she traveled to Tokyo where she met a guy who treated her like dirt. She's also from Denmark. That's all I got because her sob story was relatively weak.
Tanisha Belnap (Ballroom)- Werqin Girl
On the opposite side of the spectrum, Tanisha had a modest American dream lifestyle: In a family consisting of 12 siblings, money was tight if she wanted to study dance. So, for the most part, she supported herself, especially making costumes and doing god knows what else to make ends meet. Plus, she somehow managed to make Britney's "Work Bitch" into a passable ballroom solo.
Valerie Rockey (Tap)- Red Shoes
Her footwear color of choice. Plus, her name and my nickname= Ultimate irony!
THE BOYS
Casey Askew (Contemporary)- Le Poof
I can barely remember who he is or why I want to punch him in the face but whatever. He's got some interesting hair.
Emilio Dosal (Popping)- Comeback Kid
If you remember from last season, Emilio managed to make the top 20! However, he was mysteriously dismissed due to a medical emergency that Cat didn't elaborate on, thus allowing Aaron "Second Chance" to swoop in. Well, he's back where he belongs after being kicked in the face, damaging his septum, getting surgery, and all sorts of draaaama. He's also pretty adorable.
Marquet Hill (Latin Ballroom)- Ebony
See Ivory. However, I think he has the skills to take it all the way, considering almost everyone believed he was a hip-hop dancer.
Nick Garcia (Latin Ballroom)- Doofus
A dead ringer for Jesse "Arrogant Ass", we witnessed him and his buddy Rudy attempt to pick up a girl in Miami to unsurprising failure.
Ricky Ubeda (Contemporary)- Wittle Babyface
For some reason, he sounds very familiar but, meh, it might come to me eventually. Even with facial hair, there's no way he can hide the fact that he's 18. He's also kind of incredible, but he looked like he was having a stroke during his final solo at callbacks.
Rudy Abreu (Contemporary)- Trout Mouth
Nick's bffl, Rudy has a scar on his tummy which he incorporated into his audition. However, I was more distracted by his mouth that was open about 99% of the time and his eyes which continually rolled back.
Serge Onik (Latin Ballroom)- Babydoll's Former Partner (BFP)
Another green mile reject, whose partner, Brittney "Babydoll", landed in the top 20. His new partner likes to twerk. Thankfully, he doesn't.
Stanley Glover (Contemporary)- Vesper
I totally forgot that they did in fact show his audition, but I also remember now that my dad said he didn't like pieces like the one he used. Stanley also looks like an Ailey company member, which created this beautiful piece in the past.
Teddy Coffey (Hip Hop)- WHO?!
Seriously, who the hell is this guy? Because I only saw him at green mile. He's like the Janaya of the season.
Zack Everhart, Jr (Tap)- Dopey
Zack got some coverage during callbacks, mostly because he's a tapper (which Nigel apparently has a love/hate relationship with) but also has a face like one of the 7 dwarves (in an adorable way, of course).
Let the games begin!
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Thursday, May 29, 2014
An Open Letter to my BC Theatre Family
To my family,
Today, we, like myself, either graduated from Brooklyn College or, like others, are celebrating the end of a semester. As I sat in the audiencecoming up with sarcastic remarks listening to the speeches, I began to reflect on these past few years and here is what I came up with.
I arrived to this institution with nothing more than an associate's degree and the knowledge that it's either stay in school or find a job in order to keep my health insurance. My mother was going in and out of the hospital for an ankle injury and, later, cancer, so my mind was elsewhere. Nobody prepared me for anything here so I went in undeclared (dumb move) and figured that I could switch to another, more convenient major by taking random courses and seeing what I liked best.
Then, on August 31st, two days into my first semester, my mother passed away. I was a wreck. I stopped eating. I stopped taking care of myself. I stopped caring, period. I tried my damnedest to push back the pain by diving into my studies. But it wasn't enough. I wanted it all to end. I wanted to give up. I wanted to disappear.
I wanted to stop.
Two semesters in and, after finding help in the counseling center, I realized I was doing more harm to myself than good. And so, I returned to a familiar world: Theatre.
Ever since I made the decision to return to majoring in theatre, I've become more knowledgeable in the field in all aspects of it: History, technical, acting. I soaked in every second of it because I knew that I would never get this chance again (at least, not for a while). This was especially beneficial because I was beginning to see just how unorganized and unprofessional the theatre company I'm with now was... and still is.
But what's most important is the connections I've made with everyone involved in the department: The BAs, the BFAs, the MFAs, the professors (some of whom believed I was a BFA actor), staff members, the whole nine yards. All of you are much more than friends to me. You are my family. You are the people I want and love to be around, where we can joke about the most random things ("You have GOT to be kidding me!"), share personal stories, and just be close with one another. It is a feeling that I so very rarely experience in my career, and it made me remember that it is true: We have no time for enemies in this business. It's why the next time I see someone who acts like a diva, I'm going to tell them to write everything they know on the back of their hand, to see if they really do know everything like the back of their hand.
I am going to cherish the friendships and connection I've made with everyone. You have changed my life for the better.
You all have saved my life.
I wish everyone lots of luck, love, and lollipops in their future endeavors and be prepared for the koala hug I will give you the next time we meet.
Thank you all for everything.
I love you all,
Chris Weiss
(That guy who was always on the floor in the hallway)
Today, we, like myself, either graduated from Brooklyn College or, like others, are celebrating the end of a semester. As I sat in the audience
I arrived to this institution with nothing more than an associate's degree and the knowledge that it's either stay in school or find a job in order to keep my health insurance. My mother was going in and out of the hospital for an ankle injury and, later, cancer, so my mind was elsewhere. Nobody prepared me for anything here so I went in undeclared (dumb move) and figured that I could switch to another, more convenient major by taking random courses and seeing what I liked best.
Then, on August 31st, two days into my first semester, my mother passed away. I was a wreck. I stopped eating. I stopped taking care of myself. I stopped caring, period. I tried my damnedest to push back the pain by diving into my studies. But it wasn't enough. I wanted it all to end. I wanted to give up. I wanted to disappear.
I wanted to stop.
Two semesters in and, after finding help in the counseling center, I realized I was doing more harm to myself than good. And so, I returned to a familiar world: Theatre.
Ever since I made the decision to return to majoring in theatre, I've become more knowledgeable in the field in all aspects of it: History, technical, acting. I soaked in every second of it because I knew that I would never get this chance again (at least, not for a while). This was especially beneficial because I was beginning to see just how unorganized and unprofessional the theatre company I'm with now was... and still is.
But what's most important is the connections I've made with everyone involved in the department: The BAs, the BFAs, the MFAs, the professors (some of whom believed I was a BFA actor), staff members, the whole nine yards. All of you are much more than friends to me. You are my family. You are the people I want and love to be around, where we can joke about the most random things ("You have GOT to be kidding me!"), share personal stories, and just be close with one another. It is a feeling that I so very rarely experience in my career, and it made me remember that it is true: We have no time for enemies in this business. It's why the next time I see someone who acts like a diva, I'm going to tell them to write everything they know on the back of their hand, to see if they really do know everything like the back of their hand.
I am going to cherish the friendships and connection I've made with everyone. You have changed my life for the better.
You all have saved my life.
I wish everyone lots of luck, love, and lollipops in their future endeavors and be prepared for the koala hug I will give you the next time we meet.
Thank you all for everything.
I love you all,
Chris Weiss
(That guy who was always on the floor in the hallway)
Thursday, May 1, 2014
Chris reads: Reviews from Dora the Explorer Live! At St. George Theatre
So last weekend (and year), I performed in Dora the Explorer LIVE! at the St. George Theatre, Staten Island. In 2013, I was Isa (last minute) and this time, I was Swiper. I stumbled upon the reviews via Ticket master and, well, some people had their opinions. And I'll offer my rebuttal. But I will skip a few, since they all were about the same and/or out of my hands, like the costumes and sound system.
From 2013:
"This show is awful. The characters are played by people wearing nasty run down costumes. My daughter was horrified. Boots costume was half on an u could see his face. Why wouldnt they have the costumes where the person was inside and your not able to see the face. I would like my money back if i could get it. Horribly disappointed in this and the portrail of thr show. I was under the impression that the characters would look like the show."
Well, yes, of course the characters are played by people wearing costumes (although I do agree with the nasty ass costumes. Made by a women who teaches at Five Towns college.). And yes, of course you're going to see Boots' face, especially since they did that for the actual professional version some years ago. And we would love to have the costumes where the actor was inside and the face was masked, but that requires money, which we don't have.
Oh, and since you have so graciously provided reviewer photos, that points out that you violated the whole, "No Photographs are to be taken during the show" thing, which is pretty much illegal.
"It started 20 min late, Dora didn’t speak Spanish, the only character that looked similar to himself was” Swiper”, The actors seemed to be all teenagers, Diego’s microphone was off the whole time, No one can hold a note on their own, The only paraphernalia sold in the theater was a flashlight that had a soccer ball on it, nothing with Dora on it, they guys outside of the theater were selling better stuff, The actors were moving the set themselves, ( in the open- not behind curtains, I could go on and on, But I’m pretty sure I made my point,,,,,,PARENTS!! Stay away from this one."
I am to assume that the phrases "Abre", "Todos estan invitados", "Hola amigos", and such are German? But thanks for thinking I was a teenager when I was really 23. In a lizard suit. And I'm pretty sure I was able to hold those notes in Isa Turn the Wheel pretty well, considering I'm a dude. And you must have some warped perceptions of theatre if you think the curtains can close and open in 15 seconds for a set change done by the actors, which also occurs professionally. Parents, see more theatre.
"The show was about 45 min. Dora wasn't look like her."
Did you ever notice the special episodes of Dora on television are about the same length of time? And please proof read.
From 2014, as Swiper:
"Do not go to Dora live or this venue on Staten Island. The show was worse than a high school production, and the theatre was falling apart. Total waste of time and money."
The theatre is falling apart? Like how? A crack in the ceiling? Because that's one pretty gorgeous theatre.
"Dora character was not even dressed in her costume. Boots looked cheap.
The whole event was not worth it at all. Wish I can get my money back !!"
I seem to remember Dora was in a costume and not running around naked.
"The characters of the show should have worn the actual costumes instead of being real people so maybe the kids can be more into the show."
You are aware that acting and live theatre involves real people wearing costumes (regardless of how crappy they are), right?
"It was the worse show I have ever seen - we couldn't hear a thing."
It could possibly be the screaming children but that could just be me.
"Dora could have been in a real DORA costume for such a short time..."
Define a real DORA costume.
So yeah. The gist of it was the shoddy costumes, time, and restlessness of the children. But what did you expect for $15 and a touring company from Long Island? I certainly did MY best and I apologize for not meeting your expectations.
From 2013:
"This show is awful. The characters are played by people wearing nasty run down costumes. My daughter was horrified. Boots costume was half on an u could see his face. Why wouldnt they have the costumes where the person was inside and your not able to see the face. I would like my money back if i could get it. Horribly disappointed in this and the portrail of thr show. I was under the impression that the characters would look like the show."
Well, yes, of course the characters are played by people wearing costumes (although I do agree with the nasty ass costumes. Made by a women who teaches at Five Towns college.). And yes, of course you're going to see Boots' face, especially since they did that for the actual professional version some years ago. And we would love to have the costumes where the actor was inside and the face was masked, but that requires money, which we don't have.
Oh, and since you have so graciously provided reviewer photos, that points out that you violated the whole, "No Photographs are to be taken during the show" thing, which is pretty much illegal.
"It started 20 min late, Dora didn’t speak Spanish, the only character that looked similar to himself was” Swiper”, The actors seemed to be all teenagers, Diego’s microphone was off the whole time, No one can hold a note on their own, The only paraphernalia sold in the theater was a flashlight that had a soccer ball on it, nothing with Dora on it, they guys outside of the theater were selling better stuff, The actors were moving the set themselves, ( in the open- not behind curtains, I could go on and on, But I’m pretty sure I made my point,,,,,,PARENTS!! Stay away from this one."
I am to assume that the phrases "Abre", "Todos estan invitados", "Hola amigos", and such are German? But thanks for thinking I was a teenager when I was really 23. In a lizard suit. And I'm pretty sure I was able to hold those notes in Isa Turn the Wheel pretty well, considering I'm a dude. And you must have some warped perceptions of theatre if you think the curtains can close and open in 15 seconds for a set change done by the actors, which also occurs professionally. Parents, see more theatre.
"The show was about 45 min. Dora wasn't look like her."
Did you ever notice the special episodes of Dora on television are about the same length of time? And please proof read.
From 2014, as Swiper:
"Do not go to Dora live or this venue on Staten Island. The show was worse than a high school production, and the theatre was falling apart. Total waste of time and money."
The theatre is falling apart? Like how? A crack in the ceiling? Because that's one pretty gorgeous theatre.
"Dora character was not even dressed in her costume. Boots looked cheap.
The whole event was not worth it at all. Wish I can get my money back !!"
I seem to remember Dora was in a costume and not running around naked.
"The characters of the show should have worn the actual costumes instead of being real people so maybe the kids can be more into the show."
You are aware that acting and live theatre involves real people wearing costumes (regardless of how crappy they are), right?
"It was the worse show I have ever seen - we couldn't hear a thing."
It could possibly be the screaming children but that could just be me.
"Dora could have been in a real DORA costume for such a short time..."
Define a real DORA costume.
So yeah. The gist of it was the shoddy costumes, time, and restlessness of the children. But what did you expect for $15 and a touring company from Long Island? I certainly did MY best and I apologize for not meeting your expectations.
Saturday, April 26, 2014
I Gotta Be Me
I had a peer call me "mean" the other day because I've been acting extremely cold and confusing towards him for basically saying that he should probably stop communicating with me.
I usually respond with vague or direct answers in order to avoid conversation because, frankly, I have other things to be concerned about other than typical banter.
In the latest endeavor, he tells me the truth, calls me "beautiful" and "talented", drew me a picture, sends me messages that are about 7 paragraphs long that I don't really read all the way through because it's essentially the same thing he wrote last time, reads the posts on this crappy blog that I never mentioned about, and tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries.
And I'm tired.
So I attempt to show him that I'm not interested in him like that anymore. Because the person I spoke with online didn't match up to the person I saw in real life. I don't dig that.
He asks to hang out with me, to get coffee or tea or something. I tell him I have things to work on for my costuming classes, Plus, I hate coffee, tea, or when people watch me eat. Usually, people get the hint then.
He then suggests we work on our assignments together. I told him that this usually involves me going into the city, getting whatever is necessary. If I wanted anyone to go along, I would probably ask, but I much rather prefer to shop alone. Makes things a lot faster.
He blows it by asking if he can tag along. Common sense implies that if I said, "No" the last few attempts, it's not going to happen.
I don't dig clingy people.
When I'm alone, I'm alone for a reason. This is different from being lonely.
He thinks he understands. I'm well aware that no one can truly understand another.
There are many things to describe me, but "mean" is a bit juvenile.
One friend who I greatly respect accurately described me as, "Being a bitch, but not being a cunty-bitch."
If you can't handle me like that, then you can't handle me when I'm worse. Or honest. And realistic. I don't want reasons to why you want me to be your "friend". This isn't a contest in the 8th grade. Of course everyone tries, but when I recognize how much that person is trying, then it's a turn off.
I've dealt with the clueless who have told me the same old junk since year one, that I'm "beautiful, talented, smart." Maybe I do seem heartless and cold but I can't a robot at the same time.
So maybe I do come across as "mean."
But, if you're not going to get it, I will spit acid and leave you in the cold.
And if I be brutal and say it's time to stop, then so be it.
And this goes for anyone and everyone.
I usually respond with vague or direct answers in order to avoid conversation because, frankly, I have other things to be concerned about other than typical banter.
In the latest endeavor, he tells me the truth, calls me "beautiful" and "talented", drew me a picture, sends me messages that are about 7 paragraphs long that I don't really read all the way through because it's essentially the same thing he wrote last time, reads the posts on this crappy blog that I never mentioned about, and tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries.
And I'm tired.
So I attempt to show him that I'm not interested in him like that anymore. Because the person I spoke with online didn't match up to the person I saw in real life. I don't dig that.
He asks to hang out with me, to get coffee or tea or something. I tell him I have things to work on for my costuming classes, Plus, I hate coffee, tea, or when people watch me eat. Usually, people get the hint then.
He then suggests we work on our assignments together. I told him that this usually involves me going into the city, getting whatever is necessary. If I wanted anyone to go along, I would probably ask, but I much rather prefer to shop alone. Makes things a lot faster.
He blows it by asking if he can tag along. Common sense implies that if I said, "No" the last few attempts, it's not going to happen.
I don't dig clingy people.
When I'm alone, I'm alone for a reason. This is different from being lonely.
He thinks he understands. I'm well aware that no one can truly understand another.
There are many things to describe me, but "mean" is a bit juvenile.
One friend who I greatly respect accurately described me as, "Being a bitch, but not being a cunty-bitch."
If you can't handle me like that, then you can't handle me when I'm worse. Or honest. And realistic. I don't want reasons to why you want me to be your "friend". This isn't a contest in the 8th grade. Of course everyone tries, but when I recognize how much that person is trying, then it's a turn off.
I've dealt with the clueless who have told me the same old junk since year one, that I'm "beautiful, talented, smart." Maybe I do seem heartless and cold but I can't a robot at the same time.
So maybe I do come across as "mean."
But, if you're not going to get it, I will spit acid and leave you in the cold.
And if I be brutal and say it's time to stop, then so be it.
And this goes for anyone and everyone.
Saturday, March 15, 2014
To the Outspoken Woman/Loudmouth in my Class
(There is a class I'm taking this semester that allows for discussion on readings that, naturally, causes for different opinions to emerge. One particular peer, however, voices her opinion virtually any chance she gets. This is me venting)
To the outspoken woman,
I've known you for quite some time. I've caught on to the fact that you often don't read/fulfill certain assignments and, to cover for that, you ask as many questions during class. Others may find you to be inquisitive. I think it's just a strategy of wasting time. I would know because I do the exact opposite by keeping quiet when I haven't done anything. But this is just part of why I'm writing this.
The other day, when we were asking questions, you rather loudly scoffed at the question another peer had asked. "How do we 'dehumanize' men?'" This was, rather conveniently, written next to a question I had written, "What about male rape victims?" I had asked this in response to the diatribe on female rape victims you unleashed about how the way they dressed/behaved certainly did not mean they deserved to be rape. So imagine my surprise when, slightly ticked off, I asked you the same question, in a more serious tone and you just looked at me, slightly tongue tied. And imagine my frustration when, as an attempt to cover yourself, you said you were "frustrated" at the prospect of the question.
Ms. Loudmouth Time Waster, please consider this.
Yes, men can be a part of a few of same issues you frequently bring about in class. Yes, men can be raped, dehumanized, and objectified. Trust me, I have been there time and again. And I did catch you roll your eyes, during your own presentation, when you spoke about people who did not want to be restricted to the standard "male/female" gender roles. And I do not appreciate it when you run your mouth every five seconds while there are others who want to be heard as well.
There are many things I would love to call you but that means you would have won something. And with every battle, I lose more of myself, so why risk it. Not everyone thinks the same way as you do, nor would they want to. You are not the way you are strictly due to your ethnicity. Stop talking and complaining and DO something for once.
And, for the love of God, consider this:
HuMan
Huwoman
Catch my drift?
-A rambling, frustrated mind.
To the outspoken woman,
I've known you for quite some time. I've caught on to the fact that you often don't read/fulfill certain assignments and, to cover for that, you ask as many questions during class. Others may find you to be inquisitive. I think it's just a strategy of wasting time. I would know because I do the exact opposite by keeping quiet when I haven't done anything. But this is just part of why I'm writing this.
The other day, when we were asking questions, you rather loudly scoffed at the question another peer had asked. "How do we 'dehumanize' men?'" This was, rather conveniently, written next to a question I had written, "What about male rape victims?" I had asked this in response to the diatribe on female rape victims you unleashed about how the way they dressed/behaved certainly did not mean they deserved to be rape. So imagine my surprise when, slightly ticked off, I asked you the same question, in a more serious tone and you just looked at me, slightly tongue tied. And imagine my frustration when, as an attempt to cover yourself, you said you were "frustrated" at the prospect of the question.
Ms. Loudmouth Time Waster, please consider this.
Yes, men can be a part of a few of same issues you frequently bring about in class. Yes, men can be raped, dehumanized, and objectified. Trust me, I have been there time and again. And I did catch you roll your eyes, during your own presentation, when you spoke about people who did not want to be restricted to the standard "male/female" gender roles. And I do not appreciate it when you run your mouth every five seconds while there are others who want to be heard as well.
There are many things I would love to call you but that means you would have won something. And with every battle, I lose more of myself, so why risk it. Not everyone thinks the same way as you do, nor would they want to. You are not the way you are strictly due to your ethnicity. Stop talking and complaining and DO something for once.
And, for the love of God, consider this:
HuMan
Hu
Catch my drift?
-A rambling, frustrated mind.
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
When I Had Enough of the Company
Because I'm an overachiever, I tend to get emails from the higher ups of a particular theatre company that I lovingly complain about constantly to friends. The same company that I refer to productions as "chicken-shit gigs", where my dad tends to shut me down over not-so-subtle jealously, and the one that I'm, to put it bluntly, sick and tired of.
So it takes great amounts of willpower to not send a profanity laced email to these higher ups like the moment I had when I got an email for the summer production. I've learned from last time that these do not pay well, the experience is not worth it really, and I'm better off finding something else.
This is my response, to keep it semi-professional:
"Sorry, but I will not be available. But thanks for asking."
What I REALLY wanted to write:
"Sorry, but I have absolutely no interest, especially after the nightmares of virtually EVERY show that I've been a part of, most of which nearly turned me off from performing ever again. Frankly, I fail to find the sincerity of the words in your email. If I truly were someone who you would "immediately think of" when it comes to dedication, you wouldn't be giving me the wikipedia version of the show. We both know good and goddamn well that you only want me because I'm the only one who won't give you lip and because of my dad.
Well, I have had enough of putting up with this company of yours. I'm tired of the backstabbing. I'm tired of my dad shooting insults at me because he's jealous and everyone knows it. I'm tired of dealing with bitchy drama queens. And I'm especially tired of doing all of this for nothing but a lame 'thank you'. Until things change, I don't want anything to do with you or the way you handle your company. And if you think a meager $100 is going to change that, I may as well have an eating disorder in order to save on what you think will 'off-set some expenses [I] may incur while participating in this production'. Yes, $100 is REALLY going to offset all the traveling, food, living expenses, etc. And I'm a natural blonde.
But thanks for asking."
So it takes great amounts of willpower to not send a profanity laced email to these higher ups like the moment I had when I got an email for the summer production. I've learned from last time that these do not pay well, the experience is not worth it really, and I'm better off finding something else.
This is my response, to keep it semi-professional:
"Sorry, but I will not be available. But thanks for asking."
What I REALLY wanted to write:
"Sorry, but I have absolutely no interest, especially after the nightmares of virtually EVERY show that I've been a part of, most of which nearly turned me off from performing ever again. Frankly, I fail to find the sincerity of the words in your email. If I truly were someone who you would "immediately think of" when it comes to dedication, you wouldn't be giving me the wikipedia version of the show. We both know good and goddamn well that you only want me because I'm the only one who won't give you lip and because of my dad.
Well, I have had enough of putting up with this company of yours. I'm tired of the backstabbing. I'm tired of my dad shooting insults at me because he's jealous and everyone knows it. I'm tired of dealing with bitchy drama queens. And I'm especially tired of doing all of this for nothing but a lame 'thank you'. Until things change, I don't want anything to do with you or the way you handle your company. And if you think a meager $100 is going to change that, I may as well have an eating disorder in order to save on what you think will 'off-set some expenses [I] may incur while participating in this production'. Yes, $100 is REALLY going to offset all the traveling, food, living expenses, etc. And I'm a natural blonde.
But thanks for asking."
Thursday, October 17, 2013
Project Runway: Southern Helle
Previously on Project Runway: Heidi tortures treats the designers to a field day, then tells them to make a design for her New Balance line, Kunt gets even cunty-er (?), Prissy Punk Helen wins her third challenge but is no more endearing to me than she was before, which is she's not, and Karen blew the challenge so she got sent home.
At the Refinery Hotel, the boys (well, Justin, Kunt, and Jeremy) discuss Karen's ouster, which is just Kunt and Jeremy talking shit. Kunt bitches about being in the bottom and plans to keep his guard up. On the runway, Heidi enters wearing a cheetah print top that is just.. no. Just no. Moesha, however, looks nice and classy. Heidi tells the group that, since they're working soooo well, she's giving them the morning off via a Southern style brunch. Bradon, Kate, and the world are immediately skeptical of this.
The group is whisked away to Juliette, a restaurant that looks rustic and fancy. They even get their own table with all sorts of foods. While Tiny Dom waits for the poor soul to burst through with a bolt of fabric to say, "AND design!" (which, at this point, would be considered normal), she and the rest of the group just dine and dish. Helen is prompted to talk about her meeting with New Balance and Jeremy comments on her winning THREE challenges already and shit talks her like it's his job. Because that's all he's ever done in confessionals. As Kate hopes that they get to design for a garden party, Tim arrives and Inga knows that the jig is up. The challenge this week: Design for the modern Southern woman, who is the target audience for Belk. Kunt, who remind us that he's from the South every 34 seconds in this episode, believes that, because he's from the South, he has this in the bag. So, let's move on to someone we don't know much about, who is Tiny Dom! Her family hails from New Orleans. Helen, from Union City NJ, tells us the obvious: She doesn't design for the Southern woman (shit, no!) so she may be in trouble. That is unless she plans to go trailer trash for win #4. Tim stresses that the design can be either a day or evening look and the suggested budget is around $200-250. And, of course, only one day for the challenge (natch).
The designers sketch throughout the restaurant to get inspired (by what? Dead roaches?) Kunt, the southern belle, aims to make a maxi dress. Alexander theQueen is nervous because he ordinarily designs for the modern 80's woman so his plan is to make a jacket and pant but he already isn't feeling it. Tiny Dom, whose family is from New Orleans, is going blue with a print, as prints are her strong suit. Bradon aims for a day dress with buttons and Jeremy plans to make a jacket without it going mother-of-the-bride. On the way to Mood, everyone teases Kunt by asking him for some tips about how southern gals dress. He feels that, since he's the only one here who still lives in the south, and Belk caters to the southern girl, he should be win this challenge as he has yet to win something. There was that quiz from the shoes challenge. Be proud of your mundane fashion history!
At Mood, Tiny Dom goes for the silks since they're easy to drape and Kate goes for a print with warm chiffon. As Bradon heads for the plaids, he struggles trying to find one he likes while Kunt gets pissy sincethe world revolves around him everyone is heading for the silks and prints, which is what he wanted to do. So he goes for a solid fuchsia in an attempt to separate from the crowd. Alexander can't find the fabrics he wanted to use so he aims for a different route while Bradon finds a plaid that works! Unfortunately, EVERYONE HAS SIMILAR FABRICS! Except for Kunt, of course. Alexander semi-jokes that he hopes this won't be a battle of the plaid pants AGAIN. At least Miranda's gone this time.
I'm becoming convinced that Kate's sole purpose on this show is to recap all the challenges. Alexander theQueen says that he's only gone to the south at least twice. I'm sure he's gone south for other reasons but that's just my dirty, smutty mind speaking. As he works with silk charmuse, Prissy Punk Helen aims to make a refined dress with bold colors. Then, Tim enters with John Thomas, VP for Belk. John tells the designers that this will be yet another challenge where the winning look will be SOLD! The designers wet their pants and Kunt and Helen tells us how they're hungry for the win now.
Inga's been kind of under the radar so she tells us that this isn't really her kind of challenge as she doesn't really do colorful, femme ladies. With 8 hours to go, we go to the saving grace friendship that is Bradon and Alexander theQueen. If Bradon wasn't taken by Josh, I'm so certain these two would be banging. Anyway, Bradon asks what Alexander is making. He responds, "A straightjacket". Bradon requests he make two. Elsewhere, Kunt says someone's pants should be paired with some cowboy boots (I believe that's Western, not so much Southern) and shit talks some more. Tiny Dom, being safe for the past century, decides that she should ditch the print and go with color. And Alexander asks Kunt about Southern hair and how he initially thought about Steel Magnolias.
Tim arrives to make his daily rounds. Alexander is making a day dress with his plaid and thinks she goes to the forest (I don't get it either but he's lucky he's adorable) and while Tim loves the plaid Bradon of the Mullet Dresses has chosen, he can tell Bradon's concerned, mostly due to the plaid debacle from the SHOES challenge is back to haunt him. Tim tells him to believe in himself. We move on to Justin, who we haven't heard from AT ALL until now. Tim points out that the color combination of coral and black ends up making it look a bit too Halloween and it cheapens the outfit, which is a kiss of death. We don't hear much about Kate except that Bradon thinks her print isn't working. And now we go to Kunt and his purple people eater. Kate believes that Kunt is a competitor because he's a modern Southern man, so Tim just tells him to carry on. Tim tells Jeremy that he should be innovative, fresh, and avoid going matchy-matchy. Helen explains that her yellow dress is for a dinner party but Alexander says that the 60's threw up in the worst way possible. As for Tiny Dom, Tim worries that it's underdesigned. Inga gets the critique that her is looking too bohemian for the challenge, which throws her for a loop. Justin believes that she's the weakest this time, which is extremely unusual, even for her. Tiny Dom is worried that she might not even have a look. Tim gives Inga the harsh truth: It's hideous. Inga starts to panic about going home, so Tim, instead, comments that he liked the first look much better. Inga jokingly bemoans that she wished Southerners could wear black more often. In the confessional, she says that she's going to follow his advice and go back to the first choice. Feeling bad for emotionally eviscerating her, Tim asks if she wants a hug. In the most serious tone ever, and without missing a beat, Inga says that she needs prayers AND immunity.
Model time! Inga is going nuts and has Nastasia this week. I believe Nastasia is just that unlucky model. As Jeremy wastes time on the jacket, Tiny Dom likes Justin's direction and how he's thinking outside of the box. Elsewhere, after the models leave, Kunt goes to skype with his momma, Sonya. She asks about if his "other side" has come out, meaning this has happened in real life. While he shirks off his answer of "yes", we get a beautiful montage of him getting bitchy, bitchier, and cuntiest. She hopes he has managed to chill out, going into the bathroom to calm down and such. After the session, Kunt says that he now feels focused to finish the garment.
Going to someone pleasant, Bradon feels his dress is just safe but Kunt believes no one in the South would even wear that dress. Oh brother. He also says that it would be the outfit Harriet Tubman would have worn after getting her freedom. That made as much sense as an Abby Lee routine about Anne Frank. Alexander comments on how far behind Jeremy, Justin, himself... well, everyone is and that he's worried.
Runway day finds Kunt confident in his purple thingy but aware enough to notice that they'll never know what could go down on the runway. Kate is thrilled with her cutesy dress and Tiny Dom (who looks great with her hair slicked back) is racing the clock to finish her dress. With 30 minutes to go, Inga aims to make her garment look more Belk-like through the accessories and a bunch of other dress talk ensues, including Kate thinking Kunt's dress is too loose. Tiny Dom is STILL sewing but finishes the very second Tim comes to retrieve her. She hopes the judges will see a different side of her this time.
For the runway today, Heidi threw on a bedsheet, tied it in a knot, and threw on some red lipstick.
The guest judges today are John Thomas (of course) and Stacey Kiebler, host of Supermarket Superstar.
Kunt is up first and holy crap is it booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooring. Seriously, how is THAT southern? Prissy Punk Helen's swinging 60's dress makes the girl look chunky due to the overlay. Justin's simple and chic and the model plays the role very well. Alexander theQueen's plaid dress is pretty edgy, but I wish it could've been more cinched up in the back. Inga's dress isn't too shabby but a teense too commercial. Bradon's mullet dress is a stunner and actually looks southern. Kunt, however, doesn't think a modern southern woman would wear plaid. Then what WOULD she wear? A big poofy gown with a parasol? Tiny Dom's dress does flow well but it lacks something. Also, the slit is puckered. Jeremy made an 80's look and it's horrid. Kate closes the show with a colorful dress but I don't think it quite works this time.
Helen, Inga, and Justin are all safe. Helen is pissed because she didn't win. Shut up, Helen.
THE GOOD
Bradon of the Mullet Dresses: Zac and Heidi like it. Heidi likes the varying lengths and Kunt looks befuddled, like he should be getting that kind of praise. Zac thinks it felt fresh and southern. Nina said that he did something unexpected with expected fabric and Stacy says it made her feel happy! John calls it modern country club. Kunt shakes his head because he is an expert of Southerness. Bitch please, you are nothing compared to Celia Rivenbark.
Kate: Stacy likes that it’s sellable. Nina also thinks the dress has selling appeal. Heidi, however, doesn’t like that it makes her model look pregnant. Zac would be happy to see a woman wear this. John likes the execution.
Alexander theQueen: Zac loves the dress and Heidi thinks she looks sexy and she would wear the dress. John loves the pattern and that the dress was fun. Stacy likes the volume on the bottom and how it matches the top. Nina loves the movement.
THE BAD
Jeremy: Heidi tells him that his look isn’t modern. She’s not happy with the silhouette and she’s just a lady, not sexy. Zac calls the jacket a "casino" jacket. Stacy calls it colorful but it isn’t hip and the length is odd. Nina doesn’t think it’s the jacket that makes it bad, it must be the print. John thinks it missed the mark.
Kunt: Make yourself comfortable for this. Zac says he chose a great color, but he isn’t interested in the dress. Heidi asks where she’s going and Kunt says a formal wedding (really?). Zac calls it a night gown. Heidi calls it unflattering and notices that Kunt is giving her a stank look, which she shoots right back. He’s silent. Rude. Nina calls it safe. Zac gives him the hard truth and tells him that he can’t be a rising fashion star if he plays it safe. Stacy isn’t excited and John calls it "bridesmaid". Heidi asks about how he’s feeling and Kunt vibrates with rage, saying that his emotions aren’t important right now. She, however, can tell he just wants to roll his eyes like the preteen girl that he is. What. A. Douche.
Tiny Dom: John likes the vibe but it’s not much of an evening dress. Heidi doesn’t think it’s fashion forward. Stacey thinks she scaled back too much. Nina didn’t like the hospital scrub colors. Zac wants to see the "oomph!" she has and Nina is disappointed.
In the lounge, Moesha is sitting there like one of the designers. Tiny Dom feels like she blew an opportunity. Out in the closer looks, Heidi tries on Jeremy's jacket and morphs into a flight attendant. She admits that she wished the bottom 3 could have worked harder on the challenge but she has an idea about what to do.
Out on the runway, Heidi tells the designers that she and the judges were underwhelmed for this challenge, except for...
Winner: Bradon!! He's thrilled! I bet Kunt scowled. Kate and Alexander are whisked to safety.
As for the bottom three, Heidi believes all three of them should be out because of their crappy work. However, for the first time EVER, she's giving them an extra hour to revamp or create a brand new style. They can also have another designer help them out and they have access to all the remaining fabric in the room. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND GO!
Kunt is grateful for this and says he's here to fight to the end. He grabs Kate, Tiny Dom gets Helen, and Jeremy goes for Alexander. Kunt doesn't do much (what a shock) but Tiny Dom is going BALLS TO THE WALLS. Alexander hopes to help Jeremy make a YOUNGER dress that's playful while Kunt isn't getting it. Tiny Dom drapes her original print and pretty much goes nuts. Jeremy has made a new dress and Kate hopes she can keep Kunt safe. As Tim arrives, everyone is going insane. Kunt, however, is cocky enough to believe that he can be in with this dress.
Runway, ROUND 2! Kunt has made a tacky, trashy club dress, but Tiny Dom's new dress is miles better. It looks a bit sloppy but hey, that's what happens when you're only given an hour. And Jeremy made an underwhelmed night dress.
Round 2
Jeremy: Zac doesn’t think it’s interesting but pretty. Nina thinks it’s the right fabric and print. Stacy calls it younger and hipper. John likes the mix of the prints.
Tiny Dom: Heidi LOVES the dress and thinks everything looks nice. Zac congratulates her and thinks the print is cool and it’s one of her best pieces. Nina calls it fabulous, edgy, and easy. Stacy wants it NOW. She calls it classy and sexy. John likes how it looks all over the place (in the good way)
Kunt: Nina says she looks sexier and cooler. Stacy can see a young girl wearing it and John thinks it's more modern now. Heidi thinks he went too short but it's better and Zac calls it a night club dress.
After a brief chat, Heidi brings them back out onstage. Tiny Dom is sweeped to safety, but not before John tells her that he loves the dress so much, they're producing that one too! Tiny Dom cries and can't wait to show them more.
Bottom Two: Jeremy and Kunt
Out: Jeremy.
Kunt feels the right person went home. Bitch, no one asked you. Jeremy disagrees with the judges, naturally, but at least he can see his kids AND drink! He’s proud that he got as far as he did but he can’t wait to go back to his family.
Next time: SUPERFANS!!! Kunt goes REALLY apeshit, and maternity librarians.
At the Refinery Hotel, the boys (well, Justin, Kunt, and Jeremy) discuss Karen's ouster, which is just Kunt and Jeremy talking shit. Kunt bitches about being in the bottom and plans to keep his guard up. On the runway, Heidi enters wearing a cheetah print top that is just.. no. Just no. Moesha, however, looks nice and classy. Heidi tells the group that, since they're working soooo well, she's giving them the morning off via a Southern style brunch. Bradon, Kate, and the world are immediately skeptical of this.
The group is whisked away to Juliette, a restaurant that looks rustic and fancy. They even get their own table with all sorts of foods. While Tiny Dom waits for the poor soul to burst through with a bolt of fabric to say, "AND design!" (which, at this point, would be considered normal), she and the rest of the group just dine and dish. Helen is prompted to talk about her meeting with New Balance and Jeremy comments on her winning THREE challenges already and shit talks her like it's his job. Because that's all he's ever done in confessionals. As Kate hopes that they get to design for a garden party, Tim arrives and Inga knows that the jig is up. The challenge this week: Design for the modern Southern woman, who is the target audience for Belk. Kunt, who remind us that he's from the South every 34 seconds in this episode, believes that, because he's from the South, he has this in the bag. So, let's move on to someone we don't know much about, who is Tiny Dom! Her family hails from New Orleans. Helen, from Union City NJ, tells us the obvious: She doesn't design for the Southern woman (shit, no!) so she may be in trouble. That is unless she plans to go trailer trash for win #4. Tim stresses that the design can be either a day or evening look and the suggested budget is around $200-250. And, of course, only one day for the challenge (natch).
The designers sketch throughout the restaurant to get inspired (by what? Dead roaches?) Kunt, the southern belle, aims to make a maxi dress. Alexander theQueen is nervous because he ordinarily designs for the modern 80's woman so his plan is to make a jacket and pant but he already isn't feeling it. Tiny Dom, whose family is from New Orleans, is going blue with a print, as prints are her strong suit. Bradon aims for a day dress with buttons and Jeremy plans to make a jacket without it going mother-of-the-bride. On the way to Mood, everyone teases Kunt by asking him for some tips about how southern gals dress. He feels that, since he's the only one here who still lives in the south, and Belk caters to the southern girl, he should be win this challenge as he has yet to win something. There was that quiz from the shoes challenge. Be proud of your mundane fashion history!
At Mood, Tiny Dom goes for the silks since they're easy to drape and Kate goes for a print with warm chiffon. As Bradon heads for the plaids, he struggles trying to find one he likes while Kunt gets pissy since
I'm becoming convinced that Kate's sole purpose on this show is to recap all the challenges. Alexander theQueen says that he's only gone to the south at least twice. I'm sure he's gone south for other reasons but that's just my dirty, smutty mind speaking. As he works with silk charmuse, Prissy Punk Helen aims to make a refined dress with bold colors. Then, Tim enters with John Thomas, VP for Belk. John tells the designers that this will be yet another challenge where the winning look will be SOLD! The designers wet their pants and Kunt and Helen tells us how they're hungry for the win now.
Inga's been kind of under the radar so she tells us that this isn't really her kind of challenge as she doesn't really do colorful, femme ladies. With 8 hours to go, we go to the saving grace friendship that is Bradon and Alexander theQueen. If Bradon wasn't taken by Josh, I'm so certain these two would be banging. Anyway, Bradon asks what Alexander is making. He responds, "A straightjacket". Bradon requests he make two. Elsewhere, Kunt says someone's pants should be paired with some cowboy boots (I believe that's Western, not so much Southern) and shit talks some more. Tiny Dom, being safe for the past century, decides that she should ditch the print and go with color. And Alexander asks Kunt about Southern hair and how he initially thought about Steel Magnolias.
Tim arrives to make his daily rounds. Alexander is making a day dress with his plaid and thinks she goes to the forest (I don't get it either but he's lucky he's adorable) and while Tim loves the plaid Bradon of the Mullet Dresses has chosen, he can tell Bradon's concerned, mostly due to the plaid debacle from the SHOES challenge is back to haunt him. Tim tells him to believe in himself. We move on to Justin, who we haven't heard from AT ALL until now. Tim points out that the color combination of coral and black ends up making it look a bit too Halloween and it cheapens the outfit, which is a kiss of death. We don't hear much about Kate except that Bradon thinks her print isn't working. And now we go to Kunt and his purple people eater. Kate believes that Kunt is a competitor because he's a modern Southern man, so Tim just tells him to carry on. Tim tells Jeremy that he should be innovative, fresh, and avoid going matchy-matchy. Helen explains that her yellow dress is for a dinner party but Alexander says that the 60's threw up in the worst way possible. As for Tiny Dom, Tim worries that it's underdesigned. Inga gets the critique that her is looking too bohemian for the challenge, which throws her for a loop. Justin believes that she's the weakest this time, which is extremely unusual, even for her. Tiny Dom is worried that she might not even have a look. Tim gives Inga the harsh truth: It's hideous. Inga starts to panic about going home, so Tim, instead, comments that he liked the first look much better. Inga jokingly bemoans that she wished Southerners could wear black more often. In the confessional, she says that she's going to follow his advice and go back to the first choice. Feeling bad for emotionally eviscerating her, Tim asks if she wants a hug. In the most serious tone ever, and without missing a beat, Inga says that she needs prayers AND immunity.
Model time! Inga is going nuts and has Nastasia this week. I believe Nastasia is just that unlucky model. As Jeremy wastes time on the jacket, Tiny Dom likes Justin's direction and how he's thinking outside of the box. Elsewhere, after the models leave, Kunt goes to skype with his momma, Sonya. She asks about if his "other side" has come out, meaning this has happened in real life. While he shirks off his answer of "yes", we get a beautiful montage of him getting bitchy, bitchier, and cuntiest. She hopes he has managed to chill out, going into the bathroom to calm down and such. After the session, Kunt says that he now feels focused to finish the garment.
Going to someone pleasant, Bradon feels his dress is just safe but Kunt believes no one in the South would even wear that dress. Oh brother. He also says that it would be the outfit Harriet Tubman would have worn after getting her freedom. That made as much sense as an Abby Lee routine about Anne Frank. Alexander comments on how far behind Jeremy, Justin, himself... well, everyone is and that he's worried.
Runway day finds Kunt confident in his purple thingy but aware enough to notice that they'll never know what could go down on the runway. Kate is thrilled with her cutesy dress and Tiny Dom (who looks great with her hair slicked back) is racing the clock to finish her dress. With 30 minutes to go, Inga aims to make her garment look more Belk-like through the accessories and a bunch of other dress talk ensues, including Kate thinking Kunt's dress is too loose. Tiny Dom is STILL sewing but finishes the very second Tim comes to retrieve her. She hopes the judges will see a different side of her this time.
For the runway today, Heidi threw on a bedsheet, tied it in a knot, and threw on some red lipstick.
 |
| Guess curtains are out of fashion. |
Kunt is up first and holy crap is it booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooring. Seriously, how is THAT southern? Prissy Punk Helen's swinging 60's dress makes the girl look chunky due to the overlay. Justin's simple and chic and the model plays the role very well. Alexander theQueen's plaid dress is pretty edgy, but I wish it could've been more cinched up in the back. Inga's dress isn't too shabby but a teense too commercial. Bradon's mullet dress is a stunner and actually looks southern. Kunt, however, doesn't think a modern southern woman would wear plaid. Then what WOULD she wear? A big poofy gown with a parasol? Tiny Dom's dress does flow well but it lacks something. Also, the slit is puckered. Jeremy made an 80's look and it's horrid. Kate closes the show with a colorful dress but I don't think it quite works this time.
Helen, Inga, and Justin are all safe. Helen is pissed because she didn't win. Shut up, Helen.
THE GOOD
Bradon of the Mullet Dresses: Zac and Heidi like it. Heidi likes the varying lengths and Kunt looks befuddled, like he should be getting that kind of praise. Zac thinks it felt fresh and southern. Nina said that he did something unexpected with expected fabric and Stacy says it made her feel happy! John calls it modern country club. Kunt shakes his head because he is an expert of Southerness. Bitch please, you are nothing compared to Celia Rivenbark.
Kate: Stacy likes that it’s sellable. Nina also thinks the dress has selling appeal. Heidi, however, doesn’t like that it makes her model look pregnant. Zac would be happy to see a woman wear this. John likes the execution.
Alexander theQueen: Zac loves the dress and Heidi thinks she looks sexy and she would wear the dress. John loves the pattern and that the dress was fun. Stacy likes the volume on the bottom and how it matches the top. Nina loves the movement.
THE BAD
Jeremy: Heidi tells him that his look isn’t modern. She’s not happy with the silhouette and she’s just a lady, not sexy. Zac calls the jacket a "casino" jacket. Stacy calls it colorful but it isn’t hip and the length is odd. Nina doesn’t think it’s the jacket that makes it bad, it must be the print. John thinks it missed the mark.
Kunt: Make yourself comfortable for this. Zac says he chose a great color, but he isn’t interested in the dress. Heidi asks where she’s going and Kunt says a formal wedding (really?). Zac calls it a night gown. Heidi calls it unflattering and notices that Kunt is giving her a stank look, which she shoots right back. He’s silent. Rude. Nina calls it safe. Zac gives him the hard truth and tells him that he can’t be a rising fashion star if he plays it safe. Stacy isn’t excited and John calls it "bridesmaid". Heidi asks about how he’s feeling and Kunt vibrates with rage, saying that his emotions aren’t important right now. She, however, can tell he just wants to roll his eyes like the preteen girl that he is. What. A. Douche.
Tiny Dom: John likes the vibe but it’s not much of an evening dress. Heidi doesn’t think it’s fashion forward. Stacey thinks she scaled back too much. Nina didn’t like the hospital scrub colors. Zac wants to see the "oomph!" she has and Nina is disappointed.
In the lounge, Moesha is sitting there like one of the designers. Tiny Dom feels like she blew an opportunity. Out in the closer looks, Heidi tries on Jeremy's jacket and morphs into a flight attendant. She admits that she wished the bottom 3 could have worked harder on the challenge but she has an idea about what to do.
Out on the runway, Heidi tells the designers that she and the judges were underwhelmed for this challenge, except for...
Winner: Bradon!! He's thrilled! I bet Kunt scowled. Kate and Alexander are whisked to safety.
As for the bottom three, Heidi believes all three of them should be out because of their crappy work. However, for the first time EVER, she's giving them an extra hour to revamp or create a brand new style. They can also have another designer help them out and they have access to all the remaining fabric in the room. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND GO!
Kunt is grateful for this and says he's here to fight to the end. He grabs Kate, Tiny Dom gets Helen, and Jeremy goes for Alexander. Kunt doesn't do much (what a shock) but Tiny Dom is going BALLS TO THE WALLS. Alexander hopes to help Jeremy make a YOUNGER dress that's playful while Kunt isn't getting it. Tiny Dom drapes her original print and pretty much goes nuts. Jeremy has made a new dress and Kate hopes she can keep Kunt safe. As Tim arrives, everyone is going insane. Kunt, however, is cocky enough to believe that he can be in with this dress.
Runway, ROUND 2! Kunt has made a tacky, trashy club dress, but Tiny Dom's new dress is miles better. It looks a bit sloppy but hey, that's what happens when you're only given an hour. And Jeremy made an underwhelmed night dress.
Round 2
Jeremy: Zac doesn’t think it’s interesting but pretty. Nina thinks it’s the right fabric and print. Stacy calls it younger and hipper. John likes the mix of the prints.
Tiny Dom: Heidi LOVES the dress and thinks everything looks nice. Zac congratulates her and thinks the print is cool and it’s one of her best pieces. Nina calls it fabulous, edgy, and easy. Stacy wants it NOW. She calls it classy and sexy. John likes how it looks all over the place (in the good way)
Kunt: Nina says she looks sexier and cooler. Stacy can see a young girl wearing it and John thinks it's more modern now. Heidi thinks he went too short but it's better and Zac calls it a night club dress.
After a brief chat, Heidi brings them back out onstage. Tiny Dom is sweeped to safety, but not before John tells her that he loves the dress so much, they're producing that one too! Tiny Dom cries and can't wait to show them more.
Bottom Two: Jeremy and Kunt
Out: Jeremy.
Kunt feels the right person went home. Bitch, no one asked you. Jeremy disagrees with the judges, naturally, but at least he can see his kids AND drink! He’s proud that he got as far as he did but he can’t wait to go back to his family.
Next time: SUPERFANS!!! Kunt goes REALLY apeshit, and maternity librarians.
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